[Vieras0132]

Never thought this would happen to me. I have been visiting sex workers for almost 15 years now. It was always just about the sex. I'm also someone that doesn't fall in love quickly, it must have been 20 years ago when I was in love the last time as a teenager.

But this girl was different. She is a student and only selects her customers if you send her a picture of yourself, because as she said, she wants to enjoy the sex as well. I really got to know her over the last year visiting her every week. First I thought she was probably lying about her life and everything she told me. I didn't think she was a student etc. But I know her now so well because I must have spent so much time with her now that I can trust her. She let's me stay longer every time, although I tell her she really doesn't have to do that. We cuddle for an hour sometimes after the sex. We laugh and cry together. It all feels a bit too much like a relationship.

Although I'm completely in love with her and have to think about her all the time, it also doesn't make sense at all. I don't want to have a relationship with a SW. It's just too much for me to handle. I would probably be jealous all the time. And I also know she doesn't want to quit. She started like a year ago with very few customers and wants to expand her business.

I have decided not to see her anymore or any SW at all. Feels like I have gone too far this time and it hurts me. Feels like that girl you're in love with but know you can't get her because she is not in love with you. Thinking about her all the time hurts and I don't know what to do. I told her that I had feelings for her, but she was sweet enough to tell me I can always come back to her if I wanted to. I'm really addicted to this girl and don't know what to do anymore.

[Vieras1457]

Stop seeing her, get over it.
Go see a shrink if needed.
Get a life.
 

[Vieras0132]

Stop seeing her, get over it.
Go see a shrink if needed.
Get a life.
 

Thanks, already visiting a therapist. What a mess I have become.

[exhobo]

I guess, I fully understand your feelings, the same thing happened once to me but "fortunately" not in Finland, the distance might have saved me, even though still sometimes that event and lady comes to mind. The only thing I can say is… take a distance and hold on to it, even inside you are burning. Good luck

[Vieras0132]

I guess, I fully understand your feelings, the same thing happened once to me but "fortunately" not in Finland, the distance might have saved me, even though still sometimes that event and lady comes to mind. The only thing I can say is… take a distance and hold on to it, even inside you are burning. Good luck

Appreciate the support. I've stopped seeing her... and all other sexworkers. It has had too much impact on my life. Ruined relationships, not being able to get a new lover, etc. I never really noticed this was an addiction until recently. But maybe more people on this site haven't realized it yet. You can really compare it to alcoholism. You just need the booze every time. So I'm in rehab now I guess. At least will save me lots of money now 

[andreas]

You don’t need to find new relationship. She is the chosen one. She didn’t blacklist you after telling your real feelings. You are definitely special to her. Don’t miss this special opportunity, and go for it

[Vieras0132]

You don’t need to find new relationship. She is the chosen one. She didn’t blacklist you after telling your real feelings. You are definitely special to her. Don’t miss this special opportunity, and go for it

Thanks man, but I don't think she feels the same way. She is really nice to me, but I guess that is just her personality. I also can't see myself in a relationship with a sexworker and know she wants to continue doing this. I will just get over this, but thanks for your view on this.

[Pekonen]

This is a harsh opinion for a person in love. She didn't blocked you after you told your feelings. I think there is two alternatives: The first one is she likes you too that much she didn't want to block you. The second one is the harsh one, she abuses your love for getting money from you.You keep your head calm and think out what is the truth but even if you think the second option is the truth don't be angry to her. After all, this is meant to be a business.

[Vieras0140]

This is a harsh opinion for a person in love. She didn't blocked you after you told your feelings. I think there is two alternatives: The first one is she likes you too that much she didn't want to block you. The second one is the harsh one, she abuses your love for getting money from you.You keep your head calm and think out what is the truth but even if you think the second option is the truth don't be angry to her. After all, this is meant to be a business.

I've had a few clients telling me about their feelings. I've told them "Im not looking for a relationship and if that is ok to you, we can still see each other". So I let the customer decide and I dont think that is me abusing a client.

[Pekonen]

^ Correct, the word "abusive" was too strong word for this case.

[Vieras0132]

This is a harsh opinion for a person in love. She didn't blocked you after you told your feelings. I think there is two alternatives: The first one is she likes you too that much she didn't want to block you. The second one is the harsh one, she abuses your love for getting money from you.You keep your head calm and think out what is the truth but even if you think the second option is the truth don't be angry to her. After all, this is meant to be a business.

Yes I was thinking about this as well. I would never be angry at her, even if she would block me. I understand the business. I'm hoping for the first option, but I'm afraid it's the second one... but agree it's not abuse but just business. She would probably let me know if she feels the same way. I laid out the cards for her. The ball is on her side now. But I think I will just forget about it all together.

[Vieras0132]

This is a harsh opinion for a person in love. She didn't blocked you after you told your feelings. I think there is two alternatives: The first one is she likes you too that much she didn't want to block you. The second one is the harsh one, she abuses your love for getting money from you.You keep your head calm and think out what is the truth but even if you think the second option is the truth don't be angry to her. After all, this is meant to be a business.

I've had a few clients telling me about their feelings. I've told them "Im not looking for a relationship and if that is ok to you, we can still see each other". So I let the customer decide and I dont think that is me abusing a client.

That's a very thoughtful approach. That's about the same thing she told me as well. Wish I could just get rid of the feelings, but I guess you can't control love.

[Vieras0140]

I think it is ok to have a crush on a sexworker, if you can just enjoy it and it doesnt hurt you. I sometimes have a crush on my client and I see it as a normal thing, that doesnt have to change anything.

Dont be too hard on yourself.

[joey_t]

But this girl was different. She is a student and only selects her customers if you send her a picture of yourself, because as she said, she wants to enjoy the sex as well.

Those photo-askers only cause troubles.

[Vieras0132]

I think it is ok to have a crush on a sexworker, if you can just enjoy it and it doesnt hurt you. I sometimes have a crush on my client and I see it as a normal thing, that doesnt have to change anything.

Dont be too hard on yourself.

Thanks, I hope I can get to that point as well. It's really nice of you to say.

[Lifti]

^ Well its ok becouse if you love her she get more money. Simple.

But if you respect yourself = never see her again. Dont be like Finnish men. They are called LAMMAS - bää -ä. 

[Pekonen]

Yes, we are the lambs of the mother all of us...

[Vieras0147]

Probably isn’t both ways, but u’ll never know. From my experience many girls send pictures of themselves just to make you want to visit them. Not blocking you doesen’t mean much, But u can always ask if she wants to go somewhere without you giving her €€. If she does, there might be something, if there comes excuses then move on or if your mentality can handle ”rejection” you can keep on visiting. I dont recommend to think that the SW wants you. Ur basicaly visiting a character who is forming pretty much the way u want.